Thursday, February 20, 2014

Watching and Waiting

Today is Baby #2's due date. I'm not one to get stressed out by being "overdue" so really it's just another day. I'm just in a pattern of resting and waiting this week. I got all my pre-baby todo lists done, the hospital bags are packed and ready, and we have people lined up to help with Ava and our little farm while I'm in labor. 

I think the only thing that is getting to me right now is the unknown of timing. For example, should I plan out another week of meals and go grocery shopping or just take it one day at a time? Little problems really, but to preggo hormones they seem like big issues. 

The other timing issue on my mind is with our doula; we didn't secure our spot with her early enough to claim her usual buffer around our due date and so she has another client who was due this past weekend and still hasn't gone into labor yet! I'm not overly worried about not having Bonny there when I'm in labor but I am getting a little antsy for her other gal to just have the baby already! The unknown is a bit of a bugger. 

The end of this pregnancy has brought up some really unexpected emotions for me. I'm really excited to have a newborn again, but right along with that emotion is a deep feeling of loss as I think about my time of just Ava and me coming to an end. I think Ava is sensing that a bit too as she's been exceptionally clingy this week and is nursing all the time all of a sudden. I'm just soaking in the cuddles and nursing sessions knowing that these quiet times of just us are almost done.